The Profile That Attracts the Right One: What to Write (and What NOT to Write) to Avoid the Wrong People

You Are a Magnet... But What Metal Are You Attracting?

Let's be honest: downloading a dating app is the easy part. The hard part begins when that white screen blinks in front of us, demanding: "Tell us about yourself."

Many of us treat the dating profile like a boring resume or, worse, leave it blank, hoping the photos will do all the work. But we've learned a valuable lesson: Your profile isn't just an ad to attract people; it's also a filter to repel the wrong ones.

If you constantly get messages from people who only want one-night stands (when you're looking for a serious relationship), or from people who have nothing in common with your values, the problem might not (only) be them. Your profile might be sending mixed signals.

Today, we want to help you build a profile that works like a smart magnet: attracting quality and repelling toxicity.

1. The Golden Rule: "Show, Don't Just Tell"

Everyone writes: "I like traveling, laughing, and hanging out with friends." Honestly? Everyone likes that. These clichés say nothing about who you really are. They make you invisible in a sea of identical profiles.

To attract someone compatible, you need to be specific. Details create "hooks" for conversation.

• Instead of: "I like to travel."
• Write: "Still dreaming about the pasta I ate in Rome last year. Next stop: Japan or Peru. Where did you go last?"
• Instead of: "I'm funny."
• Write: "I'll laugh at your dad jokes if you promise not to get mad when I beat you at Monopoly."

Specificity attracts people who resonate with that specific experience.

2. What NOT to Write: Negativity is the Biggest Turn-off

We've seen countless profiles that look like a shopping list of frustrations.

• "No liars."
• "If you only want sex, swipe left."
• "Tired of games."
• "No drama queens."

Why is this approach wrong?

1. You look like a wounded person: It conveys that you are still affected by past relationships and are defensive.
2. You attract exactly what you don't want: Toxic or manipulative people see these lists as a challenge. Conversely, balanced and emotionally healthy people will run away because they don't want to handle your emotional baggage on the first date.

Our advice: Rephrase everything positively. Focus on what you WANT, not what you DON'T want.

• Instead of "No hookups", write "Looking for an authentic, long-term connection." The message is the same, but the vibe is completely different.

3. The Photos: The Window to Your Real Life

Photos make the first impact. But what do they say about you?

• Smile! Studies show that photos where we smile (with teeth, genuinely) are considered the most attractive. A face that is too serious or "mysterious" can seem unfriendly or arrogant.
• No sunglasses in the first photo: We want to see your eyes. Eye contact, even digital, builds trust.
• The Group Photo: It's okay to have one to show you're sociable, but don't make it the first one. No one wants to play "Guess the Character" for 5 minutes.
• Avoid excessive filters: If you look like a cartoon character because of Snapchat filters, you'll attract immature people or disappoint on the real date. Authenticity is sexy.

4. Call to Action: Give Them a Reason to Write

The hardest thing on a dating app is starting the conversation with something smarter than "Hey, what's up?". Make their job easy! Include a question or an invitation to dialogue in your bio.

Examples:

• "Tell me about the book that changed your life."
• "If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would you choose?"
• "Taking recommendations for the best pizza in town. What's your favorite?"

This works as an excellent filter. Those who answer your question are people who read your profile and are interested in a real conversation. Those who just write "hey" probably didn't put in the effort.

5. Honesty About Intentions (The Ultimate Filter)

Many people are afraid to say what they are looking for, fearing they will look "desperate" or, conversely, too superficial. We believe time is the most precious resource. Don't waste it.

If you want marriage and kids, it's okay to check the "Serious Relationship" option. You don't have to write "I want the ring tomorrow" in your bio, but your profile settings should reflect reality. If you attract people who want something casual, and you haven't specified what you're looking for, that's also your responsibility. Be clear with yourself and others. Those who run when they see "serious relationship" are exactly the ones you want to drive away. It's a win, not a loss!

Conclusion: Quality, Not Quantity

The goal of a good profile isn't to attract everyone. The goal is to attract the right people and make the others swipe left on their own.

A well-written profile is like a bouncer at the entrance of your life. Let it do its job. Don't be discouraged if you get fewer matches, as long as those matches are with quality people with whom you actually have something to talk about.

What description do you have on your profile right now? Do you think it truly represents you, or is it time for a "makeover"? Tell us in the comments what works for you!